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When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, 'Why god? Why me?' and the thundering voice of God answered, 'There's just something about you that pisses me

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I have seen the future and it is just like the present, only longer.

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Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.

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I hope life isn't a big joke ... because I don't get it.

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Black holes are where God divided by zero.

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Men are not disturbed by things, but the view they take of things.

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My last cow just died, so I won't need your bull anymore.

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Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.

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Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.

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I've never seen anyone change his mind because of the power of a superior argument or the acquisition of new facts. But I've seen plenty of people change behavior to avoid being mocked.